Sunday, September 6, 2009

Another Angel in Heaven

My Aunt Deanne finally lost her battle with cancer. However, she has now joined our awesome God and many loved ones that have left before us. She's now cancer and pain free & catching up with my cousin Michael, my great aunt Nanny, and my BePaw.
On Thursday, Sept. 3rd, my cousin called me and said that I really needed to come out to 'the road', and that Deanne wasn't doing very good. Of course, I jumped in the car with Philip and off we went. Now in my gut I was confused b/c I had just talked to her and she was, or said, she was doing fine. The kids had been sick so I had stayed away for a couple of weeks b/c of her weak immune system. When we got there she was doing mediocre. She looked weak so we brought the kids in to say 'hello' one last time. She knew who they were and Tyler was so brave. We had explained to him that she wasn't feeling good and that she was about to make her way to see Jesus. So, in child fashion, he told her he loved her and that we pray for her every night and that Jesus was going to make her bobo's go away. My heart was about to explode and Deanne just looked at him and said that his prayers have been heard & that Jesus always keeps his promises.
Anyways.. Sonia came by and got the kids and Philip & I stayed with her and the majority of our family. By Friday she was in really bad condition and Hospice had come in and basically just gave us drugs to keep her pain free and sedated. Thursday and Friday night it was just me, Steven, CC, and Angel taking care of her. Jennifer & Bubba were there but it was very hard for them to see her in the condition she was in so we didn't ask much from them. They were grieving. By Saturday early am hours we were thinking that every last breath was her last breath. We would wait and wait and finally come to grips with reality, and then she'd take another breath. This went on all Saturday. That last night the Dias cousins all stayed and throughout the night others would come and go. She finally took her last breath early Sunday morning. It was the saddest thing I have EVER been through, yet at the same time I was so relieved for her. She was finally pain free. I really feel she died on Saturday but her body was being stubborn and wouldn't let go, but her spirit was already with Jesus. I didn't leave that house until that Sunday afternoon. We all slept maybe 4-7 hours the entire time so we were physically, spiritually, and emotionally exhausted. Yet, when I got home I couldn't sleep so we went shopping for something to wear to the funeral. Philip was honored to be a Pall Bearer. Her wake/funeral was that Monday, Sept. 8th. It was surreal.
I still grieve for her and talk to her every night while I say my prayers. Tyler still prays for her and if he does something ugly he says that he thinks Jesus & Aunt Deanne may be a little disappointed with him. It's really sweet, bitter sweet.
I love her and miss her dearly. She is one of my mothers as I call my aunts, in place of my real mother.

1 comment:

Robin D said...

Okay thanks for making me cry! Just remember you'll get to see her again! Our Heavenly Father loves us more than to let life end after death. Life will just begin once our spirits leave our bodies, thanks to our Savior, Jesus the Christ! I love you!